Wednesday 5 September 2007

The hard times being a Single Gay Man.

In the last few weeks I've had almost the full selection of family events to attend, all by myself, as I'm single for the first time in years. Now it's not just a gay thing to be the 'single' one at these events, but it certainly seems to be the opening line from all the other attendees you meet. Nowadays just about every relative I know has a lovely gay acquaintance that they are sure I'll get on really well with. Where were all these lovely gays a decade ago when I lived in a small country town and had met maybe 5 poofs at the most?

Everyone is also so sad that you're single and wish you'd find that someone special. Little do they know you found that someone special last Saturday night, and the Saturday night before that. To me special is a few beers, a hot shag and a no-strings-attached goodbye at the moment.

So why do weddings, funerals and birthdays make you feel so alone? Because everyone makes you feel that way by bringing it up. So recently at a funeral I had more than a few lovely old ladies, that all knew I was a poof, say how sad it was that I'm not with anyone at the moment. Now, by no means to shock them, I'd just say straight to them that I'm lucky to be single at this time and I'm quite happy playing the field and spreading some wild oats so they should feel far from upset for me.

I tell you, I've never felt better than leaving that funeral by myself. Bring on more family and friend get-togethers I say. Being single is the new black, and being happily-single is more empowering than you can imagine.


So throw yourself into your job, a hobby, or your favourite exercise. Embrace it and focus all the bloody attention you want onto it, and don't feel bad for spending far too much time doing whatever it is. Just make sure you really love it, or in the case of your job, you'll get burnt-out.
And remember to go out every Saturday night now and then to find that something special, your Saturday night-special.

Written by Corey

11 comments:

Angus said...

Single is fine if you're in control of that. i.e. you consciously choose to be.

That's very different to looking/wanting/needing a partner and having little success.

So yes, in some context I'd agree in can be empowering.

Paul said...

"Everyone is also so sad that you're single and wish you'd find that someone special."

I've not found that to be the case. I've found myself wishing that other people cared as much about me being single as I did and then maybe they'd help me change status!?

I think being happily-single is a fine goal but a "Saturday night special" is somewhat sad.

Anonymous said...

Jenny, yes a consciously chosen Single life to the time being is what i was talking about. Corey xx

Paul, We all need different things, and at this time, A Saturday night Special is all I have the time for, Corey xx

eMZed said...

Corey: a-men!

Anonymous said...

> at this time, A Saturday night Special is all I have the time for

Sorry to bother, but I don't think it is so, even if I don't know you.
You should say "A Saturday night Special is all I want".
There's always time for what you want

Anonymous said...

Wow, I really needed to read that. Thank you!!

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Elliott Broidy said...

Remain positive. Good things come to good people.